Mom and Me

 

mom

You people must have heard about parents hating their child because it’s a girl but for me it’s quite opposite. When I was born my mother hated me not because I was naughty or good looking but because I wasn’t a girl. Yes you heard me right my mom wanted a girl and I was born. The biggest disappointment of her life and she hated me from the bottom of her heart. Not many days later my dad left us, I was too young to miss him and she blames me for it. Growing up I never had her affection or care towards me, she just took care of my daily needs just because she had no other choice.

My mother wants to be a politician so she works in a small political party and she works with some NGOs too. She hates men for some reason and is always willing to help any woman in need. Some women who visit our home tell me how lucky I am to be her son and how she helped them. I felt proud but never could understand why she was so cold towards me. She started growing politically and she now has few followers too and soon she got busy to take care of me and she asked my granny to visit us and take care of me. My granny loved me very much and the only love and care I ever got is from her.

She use to tell me stories about my mother’s childhood and about other things. Once I asked her why she hated men and why she hated dad and what my granny said explained everything about her hate towards men. growing up my mother saw how few men treat their wife and one of her friends mother died by committing suicide because of her father’s torture and ever since then she had hate towards men. Even though my grandfather was good man she only remembered the few moments he was mean to granny and my dad was never good to my mom, he treated her as a lesser human and felt men are superior to women. He didn’t even want her to go out or touched her money which grandfather gave to her. And this made her hate men even more.

Her reason to hate men is valid but not all men are like that. And I decided to never be like them. I always found ways to impress her and nothing seem to work. One day I asked my granny “why does my mom think all men are bad and all women are good?” and for that my granny smiled and said “women have been dominated by men for ages and there was a time when women were not even allowed to go out or even do anything without permission. Now things are changing but still women are not treated equally. Women are not physically strong and that makes them vulnerable”. I told my granny “but granny I am not like that I don’t want to be bad to any girl then why does mom hate me? If she wants men and women to be equal why can’t she treat me the same way” for which my granny laughed “son once u get older and start understanding the world you will change. You will meet men and your thinking will change”
Me: “but what if I don’t make Male friends?”
Granny: your mom use to say, “even if a man treats a women good one day when he is angry he will use his power on a woman” and I know that’s true women are physically weak and soft so they have a disadvantage. But now a days girls are using their brain and they manage to look beautiful and be independent at the same time.

Thanks to my granny I started respecting women more and I never speak to men and if I have to then it will probably be short and to the point with no unnecessary discussion. I decided to have less calories and only exercise I do to stay healthy is running as I don’t want to be strong and use it as an advantage against any women. When I finished my schooling my mom decided to send me to a hostel but the thought of being surrounded by boys made me feel uncomfortable and I told mom I don’t want to go to hostel but she didn’t listen to me.

Our college is a coeducation but it had hostels for men and women. During class few boys were teasing a girl in class when the teacher wasn’t available and warned if she complained to anyone they will take care of her during the lunch break. She was crying, She looked scared and I felt bad for her and when the teacher walked in I complained against them and teacher understood I was right when they saw the girl crying. Teacher punished them and soon they took their recent on me in the hostel. I was badly beaten up by them and soon management rusticated them and called my mom but she did not come and sent her assistant to pick me up and drop me off at my granny’s house. From the words her assistant I understood that my mom is disappointed with my behavior and her assistant suggested me not to get into fights as my mother won’t like such behavior.

She dropped me off at my granny’s place to get better and she made arrangements to study from home. I told my granny about how my mother loved me and wants me to stay safe so she made arrangements for me to stay at home and study for which my granny hugged me and said “even though your mom doesn’t care for you. You take everything she does so positively, she did this just because she doesn’t want any trouble from you again”. It doesn’t matter what anyone says I know my mother loves me.

After a couple of days my mom came to my granny’s place as she had to meet someone in the village. She came home and the moment she saw me, she slapped me on my face “you are just like other men, getting into fights trying to act manly proving you are superior. I fight against men like you in the society and now they will point me out because I have a son and he just like the other men. All I wished was a beautiful girl whom I could raise the way I wanted to be raised and give her everything I wanted in my life, and God didn’t give me the one thing I ever wanted” she immediately left and she didn’t even listen to what happened.

That very moment I realized that my mom doesn’t hate me because I am a boy, she is just afraid that I’ll become like rest of the boys and this realization made me understand what my mom wants and this is the happiest day of my life. This is the day I decided to not be the man the society wants me to be and be the man my mom wants me to be. I want to be beautiful and fragile but be strong mentally and be independent just like a girl. I started doing my research on how to be beautiful. I focused on grooming and studies. Weekly facials, spa, waxing and threading and I looked online for girly haircuts for my hair length until it gets longer. I browsed online for girls t-shirts and jeans to wear during the day and pajamas for nights. My granny suggested me not to do these girly things as people might make fun of my but I didn’t listen to her.

Soon everything started paying off my hair got longer and reached below my shoulder, my eyebrows are shaped and my body hair is now waxed and my clothes are not completely feminine but to an extent they are. I finished my intermediate and joined the same college and same course which my mom use to study. The college is now very old and only 15-20 students were present in the class. It’s still famous but now the course has lost its value and students want to learn computers and study in the city so the strength in the village is less. My class has 20 students but most of them only attended during exams except for few 12 members or so. I don’t talk to anyone and mind my own business and once few boys and girls called me girl and I said thank you and I told them it’s an honor to be called a woman and thanked them for it loud and clear. From that day no one talked about me at least I couldn’t hear them talk.

One day went early to college and I am walking through the hallway and my reflection in the bulletin board caught me. I stopped and looked at myself admiring my beauty in my mind. I gathered all my hair into a ponytail and held the ponytail in one hand checked at my reflection again in the mirror. Suddenly I heard a voice “you look beautiful” she walked behind me and removed her hair tie and put my hair into a ponytail. I couldn’t see properly in the reflection. My heart was pounding as I turned around and she is standing in front of me a tall girl with beautiful black loose hair dressed in a t-shirt and jeans with beautiful high heels. I just stood there looking into her eyes and she was looking back Into mine and smiled.
Girl: “your early”
Me: “so are you”
Girl: “yeah just felt like coming early today and I am glad i did”
Me: “why is that?”
Girl: “I got the chance to meet such a pretty boy”
Me: *blushing*
Girl: “look at ur cheeks turn pink, you are cute”
Me: “No one thinks I am cute”
Girl: “I do! You are so confident and proud of who you are that makes you more beautiful on the inside than you are on the outside”
She said those words as she leaned in and kissed me on my lips. It was shocking to me but I felt pretty and blushed. It felt as a dream come true and the moment I snapped out of my dream state she was gone. It was as if it was really a dream but I could still feel her lips on mine so I know this true. I ran to the glass again to see my reflection and I saw my hair in a ponytail with her hair tie and my lips were red just like here’s.

I felt special and I bought a red lipstick immediately on my way back from college. I even bought a couple of nail polish along with lipsticks. I just loved her nails when she held my hand these emotions and her memory is blowing my mind with so much emotions in me that my energy levels are so high now and I just want to be so much more feminine for her and my mother.

It’s been days since the day I met her and soon my mom won the local elections and is now Is now the local leader. Though she women didn’t even care telling me or sharing the good news but I was happy and proud of her because of her success. I stayed late in my class and everyone already left and I am sitting and wondering when my mom will accept me. It’s a hot day and my hair is irritating me even in a ponytail so I removed my hair tie and as I was trying to put my hair in a high ponytail.

Girl: “you should probably learn to do more hairstyles than just relying on ponytail”
I had a smile on my face, I recognize that voice it was her I tried to turn around but I could feel her hands gathering my loose hair. She started twisting my hair and made a bun on top of my hair and placed a claw clip to hold it in place. She sat next to me suddenly I had tears in my eyes and hugged her and started crying.
Girl: “shh! It’s ok I am here for you. I’ll always be there for you. Your my baby girl how can I let you be sad? See I am right here sitting next to you”
She took my face into her palms and wiped my tears and asked me what happened.
Me: “my mom she doesn’t like me no matter what I do. I dress a bit feminine and try to be as less masculine as I can because she doesn’t like men and she still doesn’t like me”
Girl: “look at me. You are beautiful and she likes you and she doesn’t show it thats all. If she doesn’t like boys then you can become a girl for her and I’ll help you”.
Me: “but I am not transgender and I like girls”
Girl: “being a girl doesn’t make you a transgender, there are so many men who like dressing like girls, they are called crossdressers and liking girls or boys has nothing to do with being a girl”

I remained silent and she hugged me and kissed me on the forehead. For some reason I felt it would be too much to start dressing like a girl. I told her I need time to think about it and since then she spent more time with me and she has always been with me whenever I need her. And it’s been 3 years and mom had a lot of growth in her political career. In the past 3 yrs she left the party she was working for and has been working on her own all women’s political party. She is planning to participate in the next elections and there is a lot of criticism against the first ever women’s political party. It has been my mom’s dream to be a chief minister and to have political party only consisting of women. She has completely forgotten about me and we didn’t even see each other in the past 3 yrs.

I feel like I have changed a lot too after getting in to the relationship. I’ve become more demanding and dominating than I use to be but not to the level of too much control. And my love has been taking care of me so well. We finished our degree and I applied for a foreign university along with her so we have to wait for approval and documentation and for it to happen I had to go back to the city to my mom.

Our house has been much more crowded than it use to be before. My mom couldn’t even recognize me at one glance. She has got more busy and from the looks I felt she has lost weight. I asked her how she was and congratulated her on her journey so far. She just nodded her head and asked me to go in and get fresh. I could sense some change in her from the way she looked at me and the way she spoke to me. I think she missed me and she got so busy with everything in her life that she must have felt bad not visiting me once in a while.

My mom has been nice to me for some reason. She is asking if I had my food or how was college. I wanted to use this opportunity to introduce my gf to her so I invited her on a Sunday. I was excited not because I was introducing a girl to my mom but I was introducing someone from my life to mom. My was happy to meet her and I left the Room with a stupid excuse so that they both can talk to each other better.
Mom: so! You and my son are you both just friends?
Gf: I think your son should be the one answering this question.
Mom: this is the first time he bought home someone and this is the first time he insisted me to meet. You must be very close to him.
Gf: yes we are close and I love him more than anyone.
Mom: can I ask u y? Is it because he is the son for a politician.
Gf: *smile* I will answer your question but first do u remember the incident when ur son was beaten up badly in his intermediate college?
Mom: yes isn’t it common with boys Getting into a fight?
Gf: is that why you sent him away? You didn’t even want to know the reason? Those boys were harassing a girl and talking vulgarly to her and she was so scared of them that she didn’t tell this to anyone but ur son saw the girl and complained about them so the boys beat ur son up in hostel. And you took him away to his grandma as a punishment.
Mom: so you heard this story from him and decided to replace me?.
Gf: I was the girl being harassed and he doesn’t even know it. Your son is the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. He loves you so much and he is ready to do anything to get ur affection. Because you hate men he stopped being masculine. That’s the biggest thing anyone can do for someone. And I am happy that at least now I you started caring for him.
Mom: yes I hate men and I may not have treated my son well but the decisions I took for him were out of care. I changed his college to keep him safe from those who attacked him. When he joined in the college I studied I understood how much I mean to him. And I am glad you were there for him when I couldn’t. An I am lucky to have a son like him.

I could see from far that they both were getting along so well and my life started feeling so perfect. My gf went abroad but I stayed back with mom and wanted to spend more time with her and soon my mom was the chief minister of the state and she got busy. After forming the Govt the opposition party were planning to frame my mother in a illegal activity. My mom looked tensed and very worried and we had lawyers all day. Mom told everyone that she is attending a meeting with her lawyers and took a break of ten days and she wanted me to come along with her to a resort. Once we got there she said she wants to spend time with me as she was worried about the case against her.

I felt happy she wanted to spend more time with me. We reached the resort and the whole resort was empty and only few staff members were aloud.
Mom: you always wanted me to love you so even went so far to look feminine for me so that I can see you as my daughter. I should have seen a daughter in you and I could have had a daughter all my life. These ten days I want to spend time with my daughter and after that I don’t care what happens in court.
Me: mom I love you and I can do anything to be with you but can’t you accept me as ur son?
Mom: you know why I hate men and if I accept you as a son you will get manly and that will lead to our separation. I couldn’t have a daughter and I couldn’t spend time with my child because I saw you as a man and I decided I will be in charge from now on and you should follow my decision and you don’t have a choice.
Me: but mom please.
She just took me the mirror and made me sit in front of the mirror and started brushing my hair.
Mom: don’t tell me you are not liking this feeling
She is right I feel so good seeing my mom combing my hair in the mirror. I could feel the motherly bond between us. She started telling me about her childhood and how her mother use to do pigtails in her hair while going to school. I was so excited about the talks that I didn’t realize she made my hair into pigtails and folded them using ribbons. She started teasing me and we hugged each other then she removed the fold and made normal pigtails while still making a bow at the end of my pigtails.

Everyday was a different hairstyle and she made me dress in the clothes which suited my hairstyles. Pigtails and school uniform and frocks, single braid and chudidhar, every night we changed into nighties. Last day I was having shower and when I returned I saw a beautiful saree and ornaments on my bed. I started wearing the bra and panties and the lehenga and called mom. She walked in with a smile on her face and she started helping me with the saree and then one of the staff members walked in and pierced my ears even though I resisted but my mom didn’t listen to me. After the piercing she placed my earrings and nose ring on me and made me sit in front of the mirror and then another staff members walked in and started doing my makeup and hair.

Mom: I never let you stay at home while you are growing up. *crying* I never treated you like my child and seeing you like this I feel bad about all the moments I could have had with you if I could raise you as a daughter. Today I want to take my daughter home and I won’t take no for an answer.

She was right I looked amazing in the mirror. Even I was shocked at my reflection. I’ve been feminine all my life but I never felt this pretty in my whole life. We got into the car and as we drove my mother held my hand and our bangles clinked each other and made a beautiful notice. There were so Lakhs of people out of our house along with media. As soon as we reached our gate my mom asked the convoy to stop and she got down.

Mom to the media: I have been wrongfully accused of these allegations and I will fight until I am still breathing. And about the accusations of me hating men is false and I have a son whom I love more than my life. People think being a man means strong and taking advantage of woman and being mean to them. My son has so much respect to woman and has always loved being feminine and yet showed the strength to fight for the right cause.

As she was talking my mother’s assistant was walking towards mom and next to her was my gf. And mom introduced my gf to everyone

Mom: this is my daughter in law and she fell in love with my son after seeing his will to stand up and fight for a girl who is in trouble and she loves the fact that my son likes being feminine and respects women.

After this my gf told everyone what happens in my intermediate and i was shocked that she is the same girl. And what came next is more shocking. My mom declared me as the temporary chief minister until her case gets solved and now I am the chief minister of this state. As I represent an all women’s party I now live my life as a woman and I am married to the love of my life and I finally have my mom’s love with me. I am now living my life to the fullest.